What is a limerence affair? Limerence is a state of mind. It's where someone is completely…
Wife cheating? Is that a question or a statement?
In your gut, something doesn’t feel right but so far, you have no evidence to confirm your wild suspicions.
Are they wild?
After all, this is your wife. She’s the woman you are going to spend the rest of your life with right?
Everything appears normal but for some odd instances when she acts a little different to the norm.
Maybe she’s going through some sort of phase and will tell you about it when she’s ready?
Is Your Wife Cheating? Check Out Peter’s Story…
This is a true story. Permission was granted to publish it but the names have been changed.
If you want to cut straight to the nine signs she could be cheating, scroll to the end of the article.
Peter and Tina had been married just four years when Peter received an offer to move to the city and take up a great job opportunity.
It was what he had been waiting for and he jumped at the chance. Tina was a little reluctant to move and it took her a full year to join her husband.
Tina was now on the lookout for a new job and after some solid recommendations, she landed a great role with a media advertising company. Peter and Tina had a shaky start.
Peter had caught Tina out cheating with an old boyfriend during their eighteen month long engagement. He left but she came crawling back begging for a second chance.
After they got married, things were going along nicely. Both had great jobs, were making plenty of money and were on the verge of buying a new home.
It seemed like a charmed marriage despite the shaky start.
But Peter had already been bitten once and wasn’t totally trusting of his wife.
He would still get mild moments of anxiety whenever she came home late from work or when she went on a night out with her friends.
But after several years, he had gotten a lot better in the trust stakes.
And he was ready to declare to himself that his marriage to Tina was almost perfect.
Unexpected Changes In Behavior
After a year together in their new town and jobs, Peter started to notice some physical changes with Tina, both in her body and behavior.
Tina was very attractive and had a great body but out of the blue, she started going out early in the morning for a two mile run and followed up in the evening by going to the gym.
She’d never really exercised since he’d known her.
But not quite enough evidence for Peter to get too suspicious plus, as a fitness buff himself, he always encouraged his wife to look her best.
Spot The Signs Your Wife Could Be Cheating
Tina’s mid year office party was coming up.
Rather than be excited to be able to take her husband and show him off, Tina spent the lead up making subtle suggestions of how boring it would be.
That he wouldn’t like it or her work mates. If he had something better to do, she wouldn’t be offended if he didn’t go. Peter didn’t go.
The same thing happened in the lead up to the Christmas party and another three work dinners Tina attended on her own.
Wife cheating? Still not sure.
Peter’s parents and siblings also lived close by and every Sunday was spent at his mom and dad’s place for the weekly grill out.
Out of the blue, Tina started becoming a no show. She always had an excuse. The gym, work, a friend who needed her support.
Now Peter’s inner warning system was starting to trigger. He started to suspect something was going on.
In fact, Tina was completely avoiding any contact with any of Peter’s family and friends. And he found himself going to get-togethers and catch-ups alone.
Tina also started to leave for work an hour earlier than normal and returning late at night. When Peter challenged her on this and to spend more time with him she dismissed it.
She told him she needed the overtime to make extra money so they could shore up their future plans and buy their dream house.
That was encouraging to Peter at first but it started to get a little old a further year down the track.
Wife Cheating? The Moment Of Truth Arrives
This is a moment most people dread.
Deep down Peter knew something was not right.
But he was crazy about Tina and morbidly felt if he didn’t ask, things would stay normal.
The fact is, he knew the truth but didn’t want to hear it in its physical form.
He was prepared to allow her some leeway just so he wouldn’t lose her.
But after seeking some timely advice and for the sake of his own sanity, he knew he had to know for sure.
So Peter plucked up the courage and asked Tina straight out if she was seeing someone else.
He asked in an apologetic way. That’s never a good idea.
Tina almost went into a head-spin and turned the accusation on her husband suggesting if anyone was cheating it was him.
Peter backed down insipidly and yes, he apologized.
He just got the classic cheater’s defense. Turn it around on the other person.
The Final Quarter
Peter noticed Tina going outside a lot to take phone calls.
When he would ask who it was, Tina simply replied “it was work, I may have to work on the weekend” or something similar.
The time they were spending together as a couple almost became negligent and Peter couldn’t remember the last time they had sex together.
Things just weren’t adding up. Wife cheating? It’s looking that way.
“What is going on”, he thought. “Surely she couldn’t be cheating especially after she told me about her plans for our future and saving for our dream house. What would be the point”.
One Saturday afternoon, Peter was home watching his favorite football team on television. Tina was cleaning the bathroom when her phone rang.
Peter turned down the television and tried to listen from the living room but Tina kept her voice very low, almost a whisper. Ten minutes later, she appeared dressed in her work suit and kissed her husband on the forehead.
She simply said “I need to go into work for a couple of hours to help fix a problem”. Peter’s anxiety grew. Was his wife really cheating? Had she gone to meet someone?
Funny thing though, when she returned Tina was upbeat. In fact, she was extremely friendly to Peter and sat on his lap.
She suggested they take it to the bedroom and Peter obliged without hesitation.
This is the Tina he loved to see. Later, when Tina was taking a shower she suggested to Peter they go out for dinner that night.
Again, Peter said yes without hesitation. But something was bothering him.
Wife Cheating? Finally The Evidence
During penetration, Peter had this weird feeling that something wasn’t quite right.
He had an eerie feeling that this wasn’t Tina’s first rodeo for the day. She felt unusually wet from the get go.
He should know right?
When Tina emerged from the shower, she told Peter that a couple of friends from work were meeting them at dinner.
“What is going on” Peter thought. “She never wants me to meet anyone from her work place”.
The night went smoothly. Everyone had fun, especially Peter who relished this rare opportunity to spend some fun time with his wife.
Peter’s earlier suspicions had almost disappeared and for a couple of weeks afterwards, he felt on top of the world.
It was Tuesday morning. Tina got up early as usual to get ready for work. While she was in the shower, a chime went off on her phone.
It was on her bedside table. Peter thought that’s strange, she usually takes it with her everywhere and guards it with her life.
Peter looked over and it was a text message. Just before the light went off on the phone he saw the name Ryan and a short message…
”You forgot to close the blinds before you left last night”.
Her Explanation? The Confrontation…
Tina got home close to midnight and simply explained the message away as a work emergency.
As usual, Peter had to accept her explanation or the alternative, confrontation. And he wasn’t a confrontational person.
But with his anxiety now ripping through every nerve and muscle in his body, he needed to settle this here and now.
When Tina got out of the shower he confronted her. He got the classic cheater’s response again.
“Have you been spying on me. How dare you read my phone. This is all your fault. I’ve done nothing wrong”.
It’s the classical cheater reaction when they get caught out. They love to turn it back on the person they’ve just devastated.
Peter wasn’t accepting it this time. He later confronted Ryan. He told him the truth.
By the way, Peter gave Tina another chance. Turns out Ryan was someone she had known previously. He helped her land the job.
Tina left her job and started a new role at another company as part of Peter’s demands.
Whether it works out or not is hard to say.
Peter is a very forgiving person. However, if his anxiety levels were high after the first cheating episode, they are now into the stratosphere.
If Las Vegas were framing odds on this marriage they would be pretty short that it won’t survive.
So, did you recognize the signs?
The signs your wife could be cheating on you;
- she is suddenly fitness conscious
- she’s suddenly going to work earlier and getting home later
- deny, deny, deny…turns arguments back on the other person
- she is avoiding get-togethers with your friends and family
- you don’t appear welcome at her work functions and she certainly doesn’t want to come to yours
- the sex has stopped or decreased dramatically
- you hardly spend any time together anymore
- she takes her calls outside or lowers her voice to almost a whisper when she answers her phone
- she never leaves her phone unattended
One more sign in Peter’s case was he felt little remorse from Tina.
He said he was made to feel unworthy of her time. It was as if he wasn’t human to her and that his feelings were there for her to trample on when she pleased.
The truth is, she didn’t respect her husband. That’s not a good thing for a marriage. Again, true story.
Has your relationship suffered from cheating? How did you deal with it or are you still in the suspicion stage?