So how long does the honeymoon phase last? In my first marriage, it lasted a couple…
In need of solutions to marriage problems making your life miserable right now?
Struggling to put the romance back in your marriage? Maybe you’re in need of a “tune up or an oil change”. How about some honest feedback?
Well, we’re not sure if we can give you feedback.
In fact, we’re sure we can’t because we don’t really know you.
What we can do is give you some of the best tips known to couples for maintaining a strong and healthy marriage.
If you and your partner have “hit a roadblock” and the relationship has gone a little stale, then the following fixes can get you back on track.
These 9 Solutions To Marriage Problems Can Help You Immediately
How am I so certain? Because they’ve worked, over and over again.
But with one caveat. You really need to want to get things going again. Not all solutions to marriage problems are a magic bullet fix.
If your marriage has got to the point where you can’t stand the sight of each other anymore then you’re either done or you’re in need of some serious couples counseling.
You’re at the couple’s emergency room stage where nothing short of a defibrillator is going put life back into your relationship.
This post is for those couples who really want to make an effort to get things back on track.
And that starts with making sure you are not neglecting each other. Otherwise none of this will help.
This is crucial. Neglecting each other more often than not happens by accident.
You start your relationship off and you can’t get enough of each other.
Time passes, life happens, work becomes important and you see less and less of each other.
You have to stay connected.
It’s the little things you do for each other that is the fuel to a happy and successful marriage.
When you get into drift mode and think all is well, then that should be an early warning signal. Drifting along simply means thinking everything os okay and you don’t have to make the effort anymore. Think again.
My Top 9 Solutions To Your Marriage Problems
Obviously I haven’t met you and don’t know what’s ailing your marriage.
The following list will give you a great cross-section of marriage problem solutions. There’s something here for you.
In fact, there should be two or more solutions in this list you can start implementing right now.
Ask about each other’s day. It’s the first thing you should do when you see each other at the end of a work day. Ask how each other’s day was.
It’s a fact that hugging produces some serious endorphin activity especially when you hug each other for twenty seconds or more each time.
Don’t give me that crap about not being a hugger. I wasn’t a hugger but when I felt those endorphins that first time I thought I’d discovered the secret to life. Try it!
Compliment each other but not over the top. Do it with sincerity. Say it like you mean it. Half-hearted is bad-hearted and will get noticed.
Support each other without sounding like you’re making light of it. For example, when you leave for work, simple messages such as “have a great day”, “drive carefully, I want to see you again” while sounding minor will be noticed by your partner.
Do this day in and day out and it will become a river of momentum for your marriage.
Do Things For Each Other
Bring each other coffee or tea in bed. Make each other breakfast, lunch or dinner without being asked.
Leave each other written messages when you leave for work in the morning or when you know your partner is getting home before you.
Leave messages in each others cars. Simple but effective and most importantly, appreciated.
See A Solution To A Marriage Problem Yet?
By now you should be getting it. It’s all about making your spouse your center of focus.
They are your life partner and you are a team. Solutions to marriage problems that work generally target repairs around the team aspect of a marriage.
Here are three more:
Listen To Each Other
It’s one thing to ask about each other’s day but the key is listening to their response.
Don’t look at your phone when they’re talking to you.
Look at them and acknowledge what they’re saying. Show you care.
Make An Effort
Make an effort to spend serious time together. Date night’s are perfect. Schedule at least one a week. It might be a movie, dinner, a walk, a game of racquet ball and to make it really exciting, an overnight stay at a hotel just for fun.
This is so simple but it’s often cited as one of the main reasons couples fall out. Notice each other. Say thank you for the things your partner does that you take for granted.
Like making the bed, cleaning the house, fixing broken stuff around the house, mowing the lawn, making you coffee or tea, making you breakfast lunch or dinner, doing the washing. Just say thank you and say it regularly. Appreciate them.
Keep Feeding The Romance
The romance was huge when you first met. Why should it stop? How do you keep the romance alive?
Keep doing nice things for each other. Things such as leaving sweet, appreciative notes for each other, organizing surprise dates, organizing a surprise trip or just simply surprising them with gifts such as having flowers delivered to them at work.
Some Final Solutions And Tips
How many of the above can you tick off?
None? Well then you’ve got some work to do!
One or two? Good start. Keep doing it!
One thing I do each morning when I get up is give my wife a kiss.
I’m an early riser and at first I thought she wouldn’t realize I’d kissed her. But the first time I forgot, I heard about it!
It’s a little thing but it has so much power.
Should it be in a list of solutions to marriage problems? Why not?
One thing I will say is while all of the tips genuinely work, they’ll only work if both of you are committed and doing them.
If it’s just you or just your partner doing them then there’s trouble on the horizon and it will usually show up as resentment.
Resentment in a relationship is poison. Big time.
You don’t want to let it get a hold because once it does, love dissipates and in some cases, hate replaces it or contempt.
I’m not trying to scare you into action. Well, maybe I am but in a positive way.
Seriously, if you are at the stage where you feel it’s time to put an action plan together then start with this.
Sit down with your partner and let them know you’re all in.
You need to do this together. Growing love times one will be a slow and almost fruitless project. Growing love times two is super powerful. The growth will be exponential when you’re in this together.
After all, being in it together was what you signed up for when you stood at the altar wasn’t it?